Disclaimer: Life update is coming next week. Also, this post is likely an unpopular opinion. Keep in mind, I have a bachelor's degree in psychology and I love to analyze things.
"On Wednesdays we wear pink." - Karen Smith
What day is it?.... October 3rd.
This topic has been on my mind for a minute, and what better time to talk about it than on National Mean Girl's Day.
Twenty years ago, this classic movie dropped, and it was both fetch and relatable. Regina George remains one of the most iconic villains, so much so that one of her outfits has become a popular annual Halloween costume.
There has been plenty of discourse about the characters, how every female group has different types of mean girls, and the overall message of the movie. I want to break down the scene where Janis shows up at Cady's house while she's hosting a party that Janis wasn't invited to. As Janis goes off on Cady, Cady tries to play the innocent role, but Janis calls her out, acknowledging that both she and Regina are mean girls—and telling Cady that she's one too. This scene hits differently today because it highlights some of the current issues within 'girl world,' especially with the influence of social media.
Although all the main characters were mean in their own way most people would argue that Regina was the worst, but I don't think so. In my opinion, the worst ones were Cady or Gretchen because they were frenemies to Regina, weak minded, and quick to downplay their actions. My ideology is in girl world too many women believe they are Cady/Gretchen when in reality they are no different than Regina. To further explain my ideology I'm going to reference RHOA and the female rap industry.
RHOA case study
If you're an RHOA fan or have seen any viral memes, then you know Nene is hands down the most memorable, and she’s often seen as the Regina George of the franchise. She was outspoken and made it clear that she was the one who started it all. She also admitted to anything she said and called people out for their b.s too. This is where Cynthia comes into the equation, and she could be seen as the Gretchen of the group. She was considered a follower, but she would talk shit too. However, she wouldn’t admit it or would try to downplay what she said. I remember when Nene and Cynthia fell out after season 6, and in one of Nene's confessionals, she mentioned that Cynthia is a mean girl too, whose talked shit about their castmates. But no one would believe it because she plays nice around the group and the camera crew rarely catches her saying something during filming. Nene isn't going to be fake if anything she's going to double down on what she said. Therefore she's continues to be labeled the villian even though her and Cynthia are essentially the same. Their friendship issues intensives when Cynthia tells everybody, but Nene how she feels about their friendship which is very similar to Grethen's behavior towards Regina before she snapped.
The downfall of many friendships tends to occur when one or both parties deny their wrongdoings, and it becomes even harder to recover when one person paints themselves as the victim to others. What I’m suggesting is that it's rarely just one person who causes a friendship to end. More women should take the time to evaluate their own actions within the friendship before they label themselves a victim. This dynamic of a 'villain' with no real victim is a common theme in almost every viral friendship stor, especially when a trip to Miami is involved.
Next case study: The female rap industry
Female rap unity is a new age way of portraying themselves as a girl's girl, but is it really unity when everybody has picked a side and strategically do things on and offline to stir the pot. I love all the girls, but most mainstream artists, with the exception of maybe 2 or 3, act like mean girls.
However, most people believe Nicki is the Regina George of female rappers, while the rest are seen as victims—just like the girls in the gym who raised their hands after being asked who's been personally victimized by Regina. I challenge the notion of Nicki being the ultimate villian when the girls engage in twitter beef every other month and they all swear it's the stans who creates drama. If they're in agreement that it's the stans fault then why do they proceed to response or engage in content that's against another artist. Then to make it worse, some of them will pre-approve and answer messy interview questions. What's the point of approving certain topics or questions if it involves a shady answer that's going to start some mess. Yes Nicki takes meanness to a different level, but at the same time most of the rap girlies are Cadys. They are mean in various ways but because the public is bias and they do mean girl things on the low which continues to make one person the villian when they response publically to things that were said or done privately. Until the girls take accountability for their actions there will be no real unity.
Sidenote: I am a barb and over the years Nicki has gotten into with other people such as Deb, Joe Budden, DJ Funk Flex, etc. not just other female rappers. Furthermore, many women claim they don’t like those who act like Regina, but the gag is they often befriend them or try to connect because it’s beneficial. Nicki's second verse in Pills & Potions touches on this. Most of the women who aren’t fond of Nicki either worked with her and then switched up, or got upset when she declined to collaborate. Whether they like her or not, they strategically reach out with their own motives, which doesn't align with being a victim or someone who’s being bullied. Just like Cady befriended Regina because it was beneficial and she wanted to be her, real bad.
The wrap up
I know my ideology isn't new but this concept tends to be left out about the topic of being a mean girl resurfaces. Regina will always be favorite and in real life I tend to like the girls who's made out to be the villian. I believe it’s better to know where you stand with someone than to assume they mean well, only to find out they’re secretly against you or don’t like you as much as they claim. Love them or hate them, the 'Reginas' of girl world are unapologetically themselves. They stand by their feelings and words, no matter who disagrees with them. I’m not advocating for any woman to be a Regina or any type of mean girl, but if nothing else, be honest with yourself about who you are. If you don’t want to be that type of person anymore, take the steps to change.
It's also okay if you don't want to be a girl's girls. Be true to who you are and show love to people who show love to you. Personally I believe the girl's girl or women empowerment concept is another way of women disgusing themselves as a mean girl. For example, female rap unity.
To conclude, I hope this movie continues to make an impact by helping every woman learn valuable lessons regarding quality friendships and how to recognize their own potential flaws as a friend.
Happy Mean Girl's Day!
"I CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL, I'M ON AN ALL-CARB DIET. God, Karen, you are SO stupid!"
-Regina George
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